Thursday, December 07, 2006

the making of lists

Feeling much better today. Dayquil is new love of my life. Hugs and kisses to Dextromethorphan HBr and Acetaminophen.

There's all kinds of things going on right now. None of it to me. Except for the internal battle between my immune system and some icky virus that wants to make a home of me and subvert my systems to its own replicative ends.


So why is there nothing going on with me right now?

As always I have my theories. My top two are the following:

The East Coast humbles me too much. I am so overwhelmed and cowed by being here that I cannot counter Hamlet's ongoing quandry: "To be, or not to be," with a wholehearted "Do be do be do" a la Sinatra.

Instead of making my life happen I started letting my life happen to me.
It hasn't been all bad. Some very nice things have happened. But all the same, this has left me feeling like an extra in the movie of someone else's life. Wait, it's true. I am an extra in the movie of any number of people.

One thing that I have noticed is that I stopped making lists of things to do. Mind you, the irony of me making lists is that most of us associate lists with people who get things done. And if you know me you would know that I have never been much of an accomplisher. And in accomplishing things I have never shown much virtuosity my accomplishing. Those lists of things to do kind of sat around and got crumpled and yellowed and ignored and lost.

But a month or two later, if I ran across that list it was interesting to see what got done and what didn't. Usually things like: "defrost the fridge" were left undone but others would get done. Some of my lists of things to do were actually lists of things to buy. And I found that most of those things that I listed for purchase were not really all that important. I think watermelon pepperomia plants are charming but clearly they are not a must have. (and with my horrible lack of plantcare skills, the peperomia family is better off without me - sorry BBFK!)

All that talk about goals and deadlines and tasks, I have always poopoo'd, but in fact I have done it too. My ability to meet the deadlines that I set is pretty shaky. But the ability to complete tasks is there. It gave my subconsious somewhere to go and something to chew on besides my self-esteem.

things to do in NYC when the weather outside of frightful:

go ice skating - there is a rink at Rockefeller Center, there are two rinks in Central Park, and many others to consider

see a museum - the Met, The Moma, The Cooper Hewitt, The Whitney, Natural History, Mocca, Folk Art, Art and Design, transit, brooklyn

Get a fancy cup of tea

go to the movies: The Angelica, The IFC, BAM Rose Cinema, The Film Forum, The Quad Cinema, The Symphony Space, The MOMA, and ... well there so many damn movie theaters in this town ... google or yahoo it.

same with the theater ... they are out there ... go to it.

Go to a live show: the knitting factory, the irving plaza, The Bowery Ballroom, The Mercury Lounge, The Bowery Presents, Tonic, Union Hall, Southpaw, Magnetic Field, The Cake Shop, Arlene's Grocery, and so on

Go out and have a nice meal.

Order in a really nice meal.

Make winter foods: bake cookies, bake brownies, make soup.

Learn to knit.

Play board games with the ones you love.

Go. Pursue happiness.